Migrating from a Kufar(Non-Muslim) Country
Question: May Allah bless you, our noble Shaykh. We love you for the sake of Allah. A Salafi brother asks and says: I went to France before becoming upright in religion. Then I returned to my country, Morocco, and married a laywoman from there and brought her with me to France. At that time, I was ignorant of the ruling on residing in a disbelieving country, as I was just a common Muslim and saw no harm in it. After some time of marriage and living there, I met some coworkers who were upon the Salafi methodology. I was greatly influenced by them, and they invited me to this true path may Allah reward them and Allah blessed me with steadfastness thereafter. All praise and thanks be to Allah. My life began to change. I started trying to invite my wife to this true path, encouraging her heart toward it. I began calling her to learn Tawheed and the correct creed, to strive in acts of worship, and to recite the Qur’an and adhkar. However, I sensed some aversion from her toward this path, despite my keen effort to use wisdom and gentleness with her. I tried to avoid harshness and sternness even when the situation might require it. After a short while, I heard the scholars’ statements regarding hijrah from the lands of disbelief. By that time, I had come to hate that country and could no longer bear seeing the faces of the disbelievers, their rituals, and celebrations, especially with the alienation we experience in our religion where we barely hear the adhan being called, we are forbidden from slaughtering our sacrifices, and whenever you go shopping, you see alcohol sold in stores and supermarkets, along with other corruptions that come with living in non-Muslim lands. All of this made me strongly desire to migrate back to my homeland, Morocco, and leave France. But as soon as I presented this idea to my wife, problems began to arise and increased to the point that she no longer obeys me, abandons me in bed, and incites her brothers against me. They threaten me with imprisonment based on the laws of that country. She even declares that obedience to one of her brothers takes precedence over obedience to me. Her brother now dares to give her orders and takes my place in the household. He even bought them a television knowing that I did not want that in my home. My wife started raising her voice at me, and I remained patient. She leaves the house without my permission. Recently, I found out she was secretly taking birth control pills without my consent. When I discussed it with her, her anger intensified. Whenever I talk to her about hijrah, she opposes me, claiming that the land of disbelief offers rights for her and her children. She wants to enroll them in the French public school system knowing that these schools teach Muslim children a disbelieving creed: that ʿĪsā is the son of God, along with promoting sin, immorality, and gender mixing. I had previously consulted some esteemed Salafi scholars in al-Madīnah al-Nabawiyyah may Allah preserve them and they advised me to have more patience with her. It’s now been nearly two years since I followed their advice, yet I’ve seen no change in her; rather, the situation has worsened. She now says that I should leave the house and migrate to Morocco alone, leaving her and the children behind. This has left me overwhelmed, distressed, and led to psychological illness, causing me to begin treatment with a psychiatrist and take medication for mental health issues. To Allah alone is the complaint, and all praise belongs to Him in every situation. So I ask your grace to guide me to a complete and sufficient solution to this issue, for I am torn between two decisions: To continue living with them in this condition, despite the fact that it has caused me psychological illness and I can no longer work. Or to divorce my wife and migrate to my country and settle there. In both cases, my children will be lost and raised in the arms of the disbelievers whether I continue living with them or migrate. So I hope you will guide me to a solution that pleases the Lord of Glory and Majesty, and that clears my responsibility before my Creator regarding my children. May Allah reward you and benefit the Ummah through you, our beloved Shaykh.
Summary:
• Hijrah becomes obligatory when religion is harmed, or when one is exposed to severe temptations. • You must continue striving to call your wife with wisdom and gentleness. If she continues to oppose, you must consider taking a decision that aligns with the requirements of the Shariʿah and your responsibility toward your religion and your children. • Your duty toward your children requires you to provide them a righteous Islamic upbringing. If that cannot be fulfilled in the country you're living in, then hijrah to a Muslim country becomes more necessary. • If your psychological and marital condition has severely deteriorated, and you're now suffering from illness, then you must take a decision that helps protect your religion and your mental health. I ask Allah to guide you to what is good, to grant you patience and faith, and to direct you to a decision that pleases Him and benefits His servants. May He bless your family and grant you lasting well-being and health.
Answer:
In the name of Allah, all praise is due to Allah, and may Peace and Blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ).
All praise is due to Allah, who commanded us to hold fast to His rope and to live in obedience to Him, avoiding the temptations of this world. I bear witness that there is no deity worthy of worship except Allah alone with no partner, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His servant and Messenger.
Dear brother, as-salāmu ʿalaykum wa raḥmatullāhi wa barakātuh. I ask Allah to bless you and grant you ease and goodness wherever it may be.
In response to your question:
Firstly: I must point out that what you have mentioned about your patience and your efforts in calling your wife to the methodology of Ahl al-Sunnah wal-Jamāʿah is a great deed. I ask Allah to keep you firm upon the truth and to guide your wife to the Straight Path.
Secondly: Regarding residing in non-Muslim countries, the scholars have agreed that it is obligatory for a Muslim to make hijrah (migration) from a land of disbelief if his religion or morals are at risk by remaining there.
Based on this, if your life in France is negatively affecting your religion where you are prevented from practicing religious rites and exposed to trials in your deen, then migrating to a Muslim country is the correct and appropriate solution from an Islamic standpoint.
Thirdly: If you have truly decided to make hijrah, and your wife is opposing that, then you must balance between what pleases Allah and your responsibilities toward your family. It might be difficult to take the decision of divorce in such a context, but if you see that migrating will benefit you and your family in preserving your religion and raising your children properly, and you are unable to bear the ongoing psychological strain, then you should consult scholars who are specialized in personal and family matters.
As for the wife, it may be wise to try persuading her through her family members or by exposing her to lectures and educational materials on the ruling and necessity of hijrah. In this way, you try to align the future of your family with the truth that must be followed.
Fourthly: Regarding your responsibility toward your children, there are many texts from the pious predecessors showing that the responsibility of parents towards their children is a major obligation. Teaching them the correct creed and raising them on the methodology of Ahl al-Sunnah wal-Jamāʿah is among the greatest duties. If you're able to raise them correctly in an Islamic environment, then you must exert effort to do so. However, if you continue living with them in France, then do your best to raise your children in an environment that helps them remain firm on the right path through homeschooling or enrolling them in Islamic schools if available.
Fifthly: If you have already sought advice from some scholars who advised you to be patient, that indicates the importance of patience in such situations, especially when you are being tested. However, if the situation persists and the estrangement from your wife continues to escalate, then the matter may require taking a decisive step to resolve it in accordance with Islamic guidelines and in a manner that serves the greater good.
Here are a few points to consider in light of the understanding of Ahl al-Sunnah:
1. Continue calling her with wisdom: You must continue calling your wife seeking Allah's help while maintaining patience. If she continues to resist, avoid harshness or pressuring her to change immediately. Daʿwah requires patience and forbearance, especially with family.
2. Hijrah and the wife's rights: Hijrah from the lands of disbelief is a matter every Muslim should give serious attention to. However, if your wife absolutely refuses, and you have children under your care, it is better to balance between your religious obligations and the interests of your family. Hijrah may be difficult at the moment due to family realities, but you can try to have an open and clear discussion with her about it.
3. Choosing between hijrah and divorce: If things have reached a point where your wife is no longer responsive in matters of religion and is causing you psychological harm, then the solution may be in making the difficult decision of divorce if you see no other way out. But take into account your responsibilities toward the children. If you decide to migrate, try to plan a future strategy to preserve your children’s religious upbringing.
4. Focusing on psychological treatment: Since your mental health is clearly affected, it’s important that you continue the treatment that will help you get through this crisis. Take care of your psychological and physical well-being so that you’re able to make sound decisions.
5. Seeking Islamic rulings from scholars: Always remember that your religious principles come first. You may need to consult scholars who are specialized in issues of divorce and hijrah, especially in cases where there are major marital problems.
And Allah knows best.
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