How Can I Balance Striving for What Is Best in the Religion Without Making Things Difficult for Myself?

Second: The Prophet ﷺ Warned Against Burdening Oneself With What One Cannot Bear

Third: Distinguish Between What Is “Obligatory” and What Is “Best” This is one of the most important matters in addressing this issue. The student of knowledge should place the rulings in their proper categories: The obligatory: He does it and does not take it lightly. The prohibited: He avoids it. The recommended and what is best: He strives to do it according to his ability and energy, but he does not sin by leaving it. The permissible: He is permitted to do it or leave it, and he should not regard himself as sinful merely because he chose something permissible instead of what was better. If you have two options before you, one of which is permissible according to the Shariah while the other is better and more cautious, then choosing what is better is good. However, you should not turn what is better into an obligation upon yourself that Allah has not obligated upon you. Therefore, constantly feeling guilty merely because you left something recommended may indicate that the distinction between what is obligatory and what is recommended has begun to become confused in your mind. Fourth: Wara Is Praiseworthy, but Not Every Precaution Is Required True wara is to leave something that there is reason to fear may be prohibited based upon evidence or a valid indication. However, it is not a sound standard for a person to make his principle: “Everything I doubt, I leave. Whenever I find a stricter opinion, I follow it. Whenever something is more difficult, I assume that it is more pleasing to Allah.” The strictest option is not always the most righteous. Rather, righteousness lies in following the ruling of Allah and His Messenger ﷺ.

Fifth: Being Excessively Strict With Oneself Is Not a Sign of Strong Faith

There is an important point here: this does not mean that everyone who takes the more cautious position or does what is better is an extremist. Rather, wara and striving in obedience are from goodness. What is blameworthy is for a person to exceed the legislated limits or burden himself with something that leads him to distress, weariness, and eventually giving up. Sixth: Do Not Allow Seeking Knowledge to Become a Door to Waswasah At the beginning of seeking knowledge, a student may hear many different descriptions of matters: “This is better.” “This is more cautious.” “This is safer.” “This is contrary to what is preferable.” “This is disliked according to some of the scholars.” If he attempts to implement every level of perfection all at once, his life may turn into exhausting scrutiny of every minor and major matter. What is better is for a person to build himself gradually: first, establish the obligatory acts; then avoid the prohibited matters; then gradually increase in the Sunnah acts. Whatever voluntary deeds you are able to consistently maintain are better than an intense burst of effort that is followed by giving up.

Seventh: Do Not Feel Guilty When Acting Upon What Is Permissible This is a very important point for the questioner. If you have learned from the people of knowledge that something is halal and permissible and you then do it, do not tell yourself: “I am falling short because I could have chosen what was more cautious.” Yes, leaving it may be better in certain circumstances, but what is better is one thing and what is obligatory is another. A person who performs the obligatory prayers but does not perform a particular Sunnah prayer does not sin. Likewise, someone who does something permissible while leaving something that would have been preferable does not become sinful merely because of that. However, if a person reaches the point where he cannot feel at ease except by following the strictest opinions and choosing the most difficult options, then this needs to be regulated, because the Shariah has not made hardship an objective in and of itself. Eighth: Establish a Practical Principle for Yourself Whenever you encounter an issue, ask your Shaykh: “Is this obligatory or recommended?” “Is this prohibited, or is it merely contrary to what is preferable?” If he says that it is obligatory, then be diligent in doing it. If he says that it is prohibited, then leave it. If he says, “This is better and more cautious, but the other option is permissible,” then do what is better when it is easy for you and you are able to do so. If you need to take the permissible option, there is no harm upon you, and you should not punish yourself psychologically for making use of something that Allah has permitted for you. This achieves a balance between two matters: a person should not use the statement “the religion is easy” as an excuse to be careless regarding prohibited matters, while at the same time he should not turn recommended acts and wara into obligations that bind him in every circumstance. Shaykh Ibn Baz رحمه الله pointed out that the ease provided by the Shariah does not mean that sins become permissible. Rather, this ease exists alongside adherence to the limits set by Allah. Conclusion: Your eagerness to attain what is most complete and to exercise wara is praiseworthy in its origin. However, do not make seeking what is most complete obligatory upon yourself in everything. Hold yourself firmly to performing the obligatory acts and avoiding the prohibited matters, and take from the recommended acts and wara that which you are able to maintain consistently without hardship that leads to distress or giving up. If something is permissible according to the Shariah, there is no sin upon you for doing it, even if something else would have been better. The standard is not always to choose what is most difficult. Rather, it is to follow the Sunnah and maintain moderation between excessiveness and negligence. The Prophet ﷺ said: “So be correct, come as close as you can, and receive glad tidings.” The journey towards Allah requires knowledge, gentleness, and steadfastness, not burdening oneself with that which Allah has not obligated.