The Ruling On a Father Insulting His Son By Saying : "By Your Mother's Religion"

Question: What is the ruling on a husband who insults his son by saying, "By your mother's religion," such as saying: "Why, by your mother's religion, have you not done your homework?" Meaning that the child did not memorize his lessons. It should be noted that the mother is a practicing Muslim and more committed to Islam than the husband.

Summary:

If the husband intends by saying, "By your mother's religion," merely to insult, revile, or disparage, as is customary among some people, then this is a reprehensible and prohibited expression. It contains harm toward the mother and unjustly belittles her. It is not permissible for a Muslim to become accustomed to such language. However, if he truly intends to criticize the mother's religion or to speak ill of the Islam that she follows, then this is an extremely serious matter and may reach the level of disbelief and apostasy, because mocking, insulting, or belittling the religion is disbelief in Allah. However, what appears from the question is that the intent is insult and rebuke, not criticism of the religion itself.

Answer:

One must distinguish between two situations:

First: When the intent is insult and common usage.

Some people use expressions such as:

"By your mother's religion."

"By your father's religion."

"By your mother's life."

Without intending to speak about the religion itself. Rather, they intend rebuke, reprimand, or insult.

Such speech is not considered an attack upon Islam merely because it is uttered. However, it is poor conduct and among the reprehensible expressions that do not befit a Muslim, because they contain harm toward the mother and belittle her in front of her children.

From the Sunnah:

The Two SahihsAbdullah bin Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated,
The Prophet ﷺ said: "The abuse of a Muslim is sinful conduct."

And there is no doubt that repeatedly using such expressions corrupts proper upbringing and plants disobedience and hostility within the family. Second: When the intent is to criticize the religion or mock it However, if he truly intends that the mother's religion is blameworthy, or he mocks her commitment to Islam, or ridicules the rulings of the Shariah that she acts upon, then this is among the most dangerous matters.

From the Qur'an:

Surah al-Tawbah 9:65-66
"Say: Was it Allah and His verses and His Messenger that you were mocking? Make no excuse; you have disbelieved after your belief."
However, a ruling upon a specific individual is not made until his intent and purpose have been verified.

Important Note: Advice to the Husband. The husband should fear Allah regarding his wife and children and should choose good words when raising them.

From the Qur'an:

Surah al-Baqarah 2:83
"And speak to people good words."

From the Sunnah:

Jami' al-TirmidhiAbdullah ibn Masud reported
Prophet ﷺ said: "The believer is not one who insults others, curses others, speaks indecently, or uses obscene language."
So how serious is the matter when such speech is directed toward a practicing Muslim wife, or is spoken in front of the children in a manner that wounds her status and destroys the respect between her and her children?

Final Answer: • If the intent is merely the customary insult and rebuke, then it is not disbelief, but it is a prohibited and ugly expression that should be abandoned and repented from. • If the intent is to criticize the religion, mock it, or belittle the mother's commitment to Islam, then this is a grave matter and may reach the level of disbelief. • The husband is obligated to guard his tongue, raise his children properly, and respect their mother, especially if she is steadfast upon obedience to Allah.

And Allah knows best.

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The Ruling On a Father Insulting His Son By Saying : "By Your Mother's Religion"

Summary:

From the Sunnah:

From the Qur'an:

From the Qur'an:

From the Sunnah:

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